A few weeks ago one of the regular ‘commenters’ on this blog brought my attention to a particular conundrum. How can a man tell if a woman’s had an orgasm? Short of asking her of course which can sometimes come across as a bit gauche. True, I thought, ‘how can a man tell if a woman has climaxed?’, not everyone comes loudly (in fact I’m willing to bet that the majority of women come fairly quietly).
This question then made me think ‘What if all the times I have not ‘cum’ the guy hasn’t been able to figure it out which is why he doesn’t do anything about it?’. Oh my goodness, that’s a horrible thought, it almost makes it my fault when I don’t experience an orgasm during intercourse. (I can hear some of you at this point saying there should be no fault attributed. Yeah, yeah, whatever!)
But the question of how do you know when a woman cums has been running through my mind, and of course everyone cums differently. There are some women who cum screaming like banshees – they curse, they swear, they moan and you just might have to cover their mouths to prevent the neighbours from hearing…but these women are not the subject of this post. The other women are…women like me who for the most part cum without any porn star theatrics (unless of course you have found some magical way to really and truly rock my world), who at the critical point moan, whimper and exhale…sometimes accompanied by a little smile. If I’m not smiling then I definitely did not cum. But sometimes I have these half cums (which are so frustrating) which release a little tension but not all the tension, so I might not be smiling in that context either.
So I’ve been thinking, what is the consistent thing that I and other women do when we orgasm? And I think I’ve found it. I shudder. My body goes a little rigid and little ripples run throughout my body. The intensity of the orgasm will determine whether I shudder for a short while or a long while. My reaction when I orgasm also depends on how I reached orgasm.
If sex was fairly perfunctory and the right buttons were pressed (for long enough) then sure I will achieve an orgasm but it is not likely to rock my world and elicit more than an Mmmm. However, if there was mental foreplay, extensive physical foreplay, loads of teasing then sometimes the banshee comes out to play…
I’m curious. How do other women experience orgasm? How can your partner tell if you cum? Short of you telling them of course.